Travellers' Rest

You may wonder why I have omitted the names of featured Travellers. Two reasons: 1, names are confusing: many Travellers have the same names as well as many Irish and Irish Americans who are not Travellers; 2, Travellers, as well as Country People who post messages to me, prefer anonymity as a general rule.

You may also wonder why I always seem to be disputing the points made by e-mailers who disagree with me. The reason for this is, of course, that I would be foolish to engage in disputes with those who agree with me. In the broadest sense, I estimate the supportive/critical ratio of incoming e-mails from non_Travellers to run better than 20 to 1. I appreciate that kind of feedback; I really do, both personally and as validation of the message that Travellers' Rest is trying to get across. Thank you.

Andrew M. Greeley is a Roman Catholic priest, well-known author and sociologist. He teaches at the University of Chicago and the University of Arizona. His column on political, church and social issues appears each Sunday in the Daily Southtown. Father Greeley's e-mail address is Agreel@aol.com, and his home page, which includes homilies for every Sunday, is http://www.agreeley.com.

Father Greeley's column for 10/13/02 speaks to the child-beating accusations of 9/13, and of Travellers in general, with such rational and compassionate humanity that I am left in awe. His article is no longer available on the Internet so I feel free (morally, if not legally) to post a copy here.

I am not sure if you all saw NBC Dateline report on Friday the 11th [Oct. 2002]. A story about Irish Travelers ran, stemming from the arrest of M______ T_______ for child abuse. Ms. T______ is a Traveler from Texas. Here is a link to the story: http://www.msnbc.com/news/820204.asp.

As a human and as an anthropologist I was outraged on so many levels. I am sending a letter to the producers, and ask that you spread the word as well. This is not the first time Dateline has produced stories on the Travelers; hopefully through combined efforts we can convince them that the racist reporting is not proper. Thanks to you all, Please share this with others, Let me know about any letters please.

[9/22/02] The other day I received a very polite e-mail questioning me about the alleged (and admitted) mistreatment of a four year old girl in an Indiana early last week, of which an excerpt follows:

At 08:30 PM 9/20/02 -0500, you wrote:
I don't know if you watch the news or not, but recently news programs have been showing a video of a woman caught beating her child in a department store parking lot. She has since been identified and is supposedly an Irish Traveller. At this point I know very little about Irish Travellers. I just wanted to know if, from your experience, it is considered okay in the Traveller culture for parents to beat their kids so mercilessly? I work with a variety of cultures in my job and have certainly learned that there are differences in what is acceptable. As I said, I don't know if you've seen the video or not, but I was absolutely horrified by what I saw (and my mom certainly chased me around the house with a wooden spoon a time or two). I am trying to get a bigger picture for why someone might do this to a little child. Thanks for any input you have in advance.
(Name withheld by request)

My direct experience with such practices among Travellers is limited to my own experience as a child among my mother's family, fifty-five to sixty-five years ago, and I have no complaints. Such little discipline as I received was non-injurious but firm and effective, always stressing the moral or ethical goal intended; I remember that quite clearly. So it can be easily established that I am no expert on this and it is indisputable that no one has elected me as a spokesman for Travellers on any matters at all.

Yet I will venture to say that my first two reactions and my most recent reaction were shared by every Irish Traveller in the USA.

First, I groaned when I heard the surnames involved, knowing full well that all the old gossip, masquerading as news, would be trotted out to make the rounds once more with an added accusation: that all of perhaps thirty thousand (or more) US Irish Travellers savagely beat their toddlers.

Then I was horrified by what looked like the fierce character of the assault. If this was a Traveller woman for whom I felt an allegiance doing the presumed battering, it was a Traveller child apparently being battered. Any child in trouble commands the assistance of a Traveller; imagine the emotions engendered by the sight of one of our own children being cruelly beaten, no matter by whom. And in public, on nationwide television. It seems a regrettable enough occurrence without that factor, but let's face facts: the widespread media coverage does make it worse, extending what was perhaps an isolated thirty second act by an individual to a mass indictment against the most family-oriented ethnic culture in the USA beside the Amish.

Finally, I was incredibly relieved when the young mother tearfully surrendered herself and her young daughter, who was described as healthy and happy by a local law enforcement official. Although, I can't say the thankfully anticlimactic ending came as a total surprise: I am one of those annoying people who picks at the anomalies of a situation and often enough develops thereby an unpopular or at least counterintuitive opinion about it. First anomaly: The camera angle and focal length (the same ones Hollywood uses to make staged Kung-Fu look really deadly) seemed to turn a five second spanking into a slugfest from behind and above but I was unable to judge whether the blows were delivered with any deliberate force or whether there was any real attempt to injure. Second anomaly: immediately after this apparent battering, the four year old girl hops up to the center of the rear car seat in what can be described as a sprightly manner, facing her mother, and sticks out arms and legs to be buckled in. It's a pity that the mother didn't stop right there, but my point is that this is not the behavior to be expected from a child who has just been injured or lives in habitual fear.

To get back to my response to your e-mail: it's a lucky thing for your spoon-wielding mother perhaps that there were no surveillance cameras around. And one more thing: (this sounds kind of snotty but I mean it kindly) is the question, "I just wanted to know if, from your experience, it is considered okay in [the Traveller] culture for parents to beat their kids so mercilessly?" one you would ask of a Chinese, or a Mexican, or a Black under the same circumstances. Then why us?

At 10:26 PM 9/27/02 -0500, you wrote:
It's me - that original "acceptable behavior" e-mailer. You ask in your reply on your site if I would ask the same question (Is it considered okay in your culture for parents to beat the kids so mercilessly?) of a Mexican, African American, etc. The answer is yes. I would, and I have. So why not you? Also, my spoon-wielding mother may have chased me around the house as a flippant pre-teen, but never hit me anywhere but on the bumper.

My only other question to you is: Do you actually have kids? And if so, how long has it been since you put one in a car seat? The place in the video when I saw the child's legs sticking straight out, made me wonder how upset she was. The only time my children stick their legs straight out like that when I put them in their car seats is when they're screeching bloody murder about something (albeit, not a vicious beating, but children find a variety of things highly upsetting). I work with children every day. Based on my experience with so many children over the last thirteen years, that little girl in the video was at the very least confused and fearful. And I'd bet my life she was terrified. The mother's tearful surrender is typical of an abuser after the fact: seemingly full of heartfelt remorse. "Nothing like this has EVER happened before, it will NEVER happen again, the authorities were wrong to take my child away," yadda, yadda. The ONLY anomaly I saw in that video was the mother herself.

I have no children and have never "installed" one in a car-seat but, judging by the e-mail response (from non-Travellers), more of those responding who do have them agree with my interpretation of the child's responses than with yours. Tell me: if you hadn't seen the first few seconds of that video clip, if it had started with the little one jumping up onto the car seat, would you be so certain that her motions evidenced extreme mental or physical distress? If you have the incident recorded, review it please as I have, and try not to pre-judge just that segment. As for "screeching bloody murder," the girl had just been spanked and my admittedly limited Traveller contacts tell me the word is that the four year old has the self-assurance and lung power of a long-haul trucker (my metaphor). I grant you she might have been "screeching bloody murder" [but she wasn't cowering].

In any event, if you'll re-read the text in this regard, you will note that I was not extolling the virtues of the mother's parenting, excusing her actions or even distancing myself and other Travellers from her. Instead, I was smugly congratulating myself for not rushing to judgment and predicting (to myself) that the child would be found upon examination to be safe and sound, as seems to be the case.

Yes, the mother's responses can be interpreted as counterfeit, but after all, they are the same responses that would characterize a sincerely remorseful mother guilty of a one-time transgression. Truly, are there any responses that would satisfy you, short of suicide? She snapped; that's it. It's up to due process (how can they ever impanel an impartial judge, much less jury?) to determine the future for that family.

One more word about "responses": I reviewed the CNN transcript of one of her interviews (9/22/02). The reporter (Gary Tuchman) pointedly asked the mother precise questions about the behavior her child in the store, which she directly and succinctly answered, and precise questions about her emotional state before and after the incident, which she also answered in the same fashion, admitting guilt and offering no excuses. Tuchman is clearly surprised, perhaps mildly shocked, by her candor. Excerpt follows:

TUCHMAN: Why were you doing this?

THE MOTHER: There was no excuse. There would be no excuse in the world why I did it.

TUCHMAN: But you were at a Kohl's Department Store not far from here. What happened in that store that led you to be so angry?

THE MOTHER: I was nervous in the store. M_____ was underneath things but I -- M_____ is M_____ and she's four years old and there's nothing she did that she hasn't did a million times. And I've never lashed out like that. So there was -- I can't make any excuses.

There was nothing that would provoke me to do something like that. It was just -- I don't know -- I don't know why I did it. I -- there would be no reason to explain why I did it because is no explanation for it.

TUCHMAN: Were you hit as a child?

THE MOTHER: No, I was never -- I was probably very repulsive as a child. I was never hit.

TUCHMAN: Have you hit your children before?

THE MOTHER: I've spanked them before. No -- I've never battered them before or abused them before.

TUCHMAN: You call it battering and abusing yourself.

THE MOTHER: It looks like it -- yeah.

TUCHMAN: But the fact that you're saying that -- this is the first time you've battered or abused a child and it was caught on video tape.

Do you consider yourself unlucky that you were caught?

THE MOTHER: Of course, I do. It's not that -- if there's 500 spots, that was the only spot in the whole thing. But maybe it's a blessing in disguise. Maybe -- it's ruined my life. Maybe it will save some other child, some other mothers from doing it to theirs.

It's -- I'm -- I can't walk outside. I'm a monster to everybody. And so hopefully somebody will be educated enough to know don't raise your hand to your child. Don't do it -- it's not worth it.

TUCHMAN: Rocket Rosen -- the candor we're hearing from your client and from yourself are very unusual. How come you're willing to speak so much about this? You're letting her speak so much. You basically admit -- she's basically admitting she's guilty of this crime.

Excerpt ended:

Within a day or two, reporters were interviewing each other, desperately spinning the story to justify showing that thirty-second video clip over and over in preview promos. The mother's admission was now widely reported to have likely been self-serving rationalization. I ask you to take a moment to read her comments again. Rationalization?

By 9/24/02 editorial pieces like the following NY Post column by Andrea Peyser appeared: Excerpt follows:

This train wreck of a mom is one of the so-called "Irish Travelers" - nomadic misfits of which I'd never before heard. Travelers wander with the seasons, looking for work in home repair. Previously, they drew the attention of authorities only for scamming customers.

the mother is charged in Texas with skipping out on a traffic ticket and stealing goods from a department store.

About the beating she inflicted on M_____, she told an interviewer: "I shouldn't have did it." And, "Don't raise your hand to a child, it ain't worth it."

Ain't it the truth?

The truth is that the mother's appalling attitude toward child-rearing is not so different from the thinking of many who see children as personal property to be raised as they see fit.

Little M_____ is now in the care of strangers, while her brothers, ages 5 and 6, are with relatives. I feel for a child ripped from her parents. But this travesty of a family can't continue.

By foisting a bizarre, authority-shunning way of life on kids, the Travelers put them in danger. the mother and her kind should be kept miles from children. Unless they agree to settle down in a place where they can be watched.

Excerpt ended:

Sure, take the kids away; put all the traveling Travellers in internment camps. For someone who says she knew nothing about us a few days ago she sure has radical opinions, doesn't she? From where does she get justification for them? Not from the few scholars who have actually researched the Travelling Peoples; they've been uniformly fair and supportive. Possibly she believed that guy trying to peddle his six-year old book about dishonest Travellers, apparently the only kind he ever thought he knew, largely based on interviews with my fourth or fifth cousin, Jimmy. I never met Jimmy for several reasons: I wasn't that socially active myself and one other little thing: Jimmy was said to be shunned by the rest of the Travellers and was really bitter about it. But anyway, that writer would be a possible source of misinformation for Ms. Peyser.

Or her sources might be about half-a-dozen (maybe more, by now) law enforcement people who "specialize" in Irish Travellers, that make their living tracking down and/or teaching others to track down Travellers. It's a given, as far as I am concerned, that they're well intentioned and fair, because, for all the profiling, very few Travellers wind up going to jail. Go ahead and ask. I think that, if there were any proper statistics on the subject, Travellers would have a very low felony conviction rate. All right, not as low as the Amish.

But I'm dancing to the wrong piper's tune here. You can see that the mother is now additionally guilty of being a Traveller and Travellers are all guilty of inferred child abuse. This may bring about a real judicial paradox: a battery conviction without physical injury. I'm not sure which anchor/reporter team said this but the proposition was put forward on air that the mother who battered her child on camera would have to pay a heavy price for all of those who did it unseen. And so one unharmed child may be isolated from her immediate and extended family, removed by one state in a nation that is awash in the blood of mistreated, not to mention missing, children. The hypocrisy of it rankles.

Is it any wonder that Travellers wish to be left to themselves?

At 06:13 PM 9/29/02 -0500, you wrote:
Well, I think we are just going to have to agree to disagree here. I don't
have the video clip taped, so I can't watch it again. I felt nauseous for
two hours after seeing it the first time, so I certainly had no desire to
record it and tuck it in the shelf with fond family memories. I probably
would not have thought M_____ was screaming had I not seen the first part of
the video, but I sure would have wondered what had transpired after seeing
the last part. I think the last few seconds were more brutal than the
first.

The mother's responses in the CNN interview and other snippets that I have
seen could perhaps be one of a sincerely remorseful mother - not likely
here, but perhaps. I would be more inclined to take her at her word if she
had come on camera shortly after the incident and said those things - BEFORE
speaking to an attorney. As it was she granted interviews after undoubtedly
some lengthy telephone conversations with her attorney. She is obviously
not well-educated, but I don't think she's stupid either. She is not
book-smart and she sure doesn't have a whole lot of emotional intelligence
or she wouldn't feel the need to beat her child - just that once of course.
That leaves mechanical/technical smarts and street smarts. She may have
mechanical smarts. Maybe that's how she makes her living. But I guarantee
she has street smarts and she's using them.

The complete and utter remorse she is exhibiting is the ONLY chance she has
right now to get her kids back and retain permanent custody of them. It's
the ONLY chance. She knows it. Her attorney knows. And he has coached her
accordingly. Her only other chance would have been a life on the run. And
considering her mug has made national TV several nights in a row that option
is out. I do think it was interesting that she dyed her hair - back to its
original color - I think. Was she just trying to avoid being recognized
until she turned herself in or was she going to stay on the move with M_____
until the hoopla subsided, but realized there was even too much media
coverage for that?

I also think it is worthy to note that in the CNN interview she says of
mothers thinking of hitting their children not to do it because it's not
worth it. She didn't say not to do it because she realizes it was wrong,
she said it wasn't worth it. Not worth the hassle of getting caught I
suppose.

I don't know what to say about the associations the media is making between
this woman and the Irish Traveller culture. I'd never heard of them before
it was mentioned once on the news I was watching. I haven't heard anything
else about Irish Travellers from television since then. I'm pretty busy and
don't watch much news. I've read little bits on the internet and on your
site. I don't have a problem with how other people live as long as they
live honestly - to the letter of the law (no matter how silly some of our
laws seem), pay their taxes (even though there may be way too many of them),
and don't expect me to necessarily approve of their lifestyle. As my dad
used to say, "It takes all kinds."

My mother used to say almost the same thing, "It takes all kinds to make a world."

Change "brutal" to "brutal looking" above and we're not so far apart on that score. And forget about "street smarts"; the woman tried to return goods to Kohl's that the store didn't handle. As a retail customer that was dumb; if it was an attempt at criminality it was absolutely stupid.

Please don't put yourself in her shoes to judge her subsequent actions, you think too clearly; instead, think PANIC and thank God she did follow someone else's advice (or scheme, if you prefer).

I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for Travellers to observe the letter of the law or pay every fee and tax imposed by local authorities, that's impossible for nomads. It's meant to be impossible for nomads. Competing local merchants have all the local clout. Many restrictions, for example the refusal of asphalt suppliers to sell except to local contractors in some areas, amount to a boycott, restraint of trade. But go fight City Hall; it says what's legal, at least on a local level.

I concur: the time has come to agree to disagree on the remainder. Thank you for a spirited discourse.

Richard

[10/9/02] The entire Traveller community is feeling considerably relieved now: little M_____ has been placed in the care of her maternal grandmother. The needs of the child may be paramount (and this is the best solution to meet them, I think, for the moment) but the needs of her extended family are also of no small significance in this matter. The cultural tradition of Travellers fostering our own, when necessary, is so strong that it has spiritual and psychological imperatives well beyond those known to most Country People. There's been a December 6, 2002 deadline set for a plea agreement between the mother and the prosecutor; the immediate family reportedly will continue to to be allowed only one supervised visit per week for the time being.

At 01:14 PM 9/26/02 -0400, you wrote:
I am disturbed by the fact that you seem to try to downgrade the severity of what happened to this child. I am a firm believer in corporal punishment as you describe receiving in your childhood. I also understand that good parents can lose control but this was not a five second spanking. I would expect a child that was in fear to sit in his or her seat and do what they are told as a result of that fear.

My reply:
This started with a five second spanking, one that seemed very violent from behind and above. The effects of the blows, however, were not visible, but had to be guessed at. I was relieved at the body language of the child immediately following that and estimated that something had, if not stayed, at least tempered the mother's hand (and by extension would continue to do so throughout the slapping and hair-pulling).

Whether one thinks that restraint was brought about by innate maternal decency, animal cunning or the hand of a guardian angel will matter only to oneself and one's God; the fact of the matter is that the little girl has [to all appearances] been pronounced free of any physical signs of short or long term abuse by both neutral and hostile examiners. Q.E.D..

This is not any kind of endorsement of the mother's parenting, far from it, but a twenty-five second loss of control that seems to have done no lasting harm and is unlikely to be repeated, should not break up a family unit if only for the sake of the child. I can assure you that she and her immediate family will get a world of support from their kith and kin but the offending mother will feel the shame of this occurrence and its repercussions until her dying day.

At 03:41 PM 10/2/02 -0400, you wrote:
First let me start by saying I have found your website informative and entertaining.
But with all due respect, you need to view the videotape once more of the beating by [the mother] upon her 4 year old daughter. That child did not "hop up to the car seat in a sprightly manner".

My reply: Yes, she definitely did.

It appears she was put in the carseat by the head of her hair.

My reply: No, she definitely was not. I can't believe that you have an acceptable quality videotaped straight-through copy of that part of the clip.

And the closed fist at the end of the "attack" makes it pretty clear the little girl was being punched or "knobbed" in the head, as her loving mother so eloquently put it.

My reply: The child's head can't be seen during that phase of the clip, so the actual force employed and effects suffered have to be guesswork. Still, we're both agreed that even the least "knobbing" and violent head-shaking is way over the line.

Guess this is just an example of the Irish Travellers sticking together.

My reply: Yes. I believe that I am on the side of a little Traveller girl, just as you are.

I'm Irish myself so I harbor no prejudice against the Travellers

My reply: I think you mean "Irish-American." If you were Irish, in general, you wouldn't be able to honestly say that. I'm a Traveller but I'm also an American who really believes in "presumption of innocence."

and I don't think this behavior is common among Travellers. But what's on the tape is self evident

My reply: And I am an orthodox skeptic who believes that nothing should be unconditionally accepted as "self-evident."

and Travellers should come together and let the world know they won't tolerate child abuse among their people.

My reply: This web site reflects one man's opinion only. If other Travellers wish to get together to generate an "acceptable" answer to the question, "Do you still beat your children?" then they will do so, but not at my urging. Those who know us do not need any such assurance; others will assume (and you know that they will) that Travellers would not [feel the] need to deny such "charges" unless there was general truth to them. And the media merry-go-round will take another turn.

Instead of defending or downplaying the attack on this poor girl by her own mother. If an Irish Traveller or anyone else had attacked an adult in that manner, they would surely have been arrested for assault and rightfully so. Why should this woman be allowed to pummel a child simply because it's her child and this is her chosen form of discipline? I'd like to hear your thoughts on this matter.

My reply: I have chosen to wait for all the evidence to be presented and weighed before making a judgment for myself [on the individual]. In my life I have often seen situations with "much sound and fury, signifying nothing." I half-expect and certainly hope that this will be another such case, and that there will a reassurance established by the private and state medical examinations that the little girl is all right and has been all right all along. If the photos taken a short time after by the mother's private physician are of good enough quality to identify the girl and prove that she was bruise-free shortly after the brutal-looking attack, then the mother will have gone a long way, in my opinion, [to re-establish her claim on an opportunity] to learn how to be a better parent in the company of her little girl.

Here is a lighter note:

hi, i'm writing a paper for my english class at school, on Irish
Travellers. I was wondering if you could tell me the purpose for the
Irish Travellers. Why do you stay in your communities and stay as Irish
Travellers? I was also wondering if you knew of a web site that would
tell me more about the purpose for your group. Also I would like to know
your thoughts on people claiming that you are mostly con artists. Is it
true, are you raised being taught to be a con artist? if you could
answer my questions or lead me to a web site that would be great.
thank you
M_____

Well, M_____,

I'm only half-Traveller but I'll see what I can do. I can't explain us; our origins go back a long way but there is only an occasional mention of us (or people very much like us) in Irish history and legends now and then. Our purpose today is to survive as ourselves, like most other ethnic minorities wish to do.

There are several links from my own site, Travellers' Rest, which may be of help to you. The links can be found at: http://www.travellersrest.org/linkage.htm

No, most Irish Travellers are brought up to be hard workers in gainful self-employment, needing the freedom of the road, and possessed of a real gift of salesmanship. Life as a nomad in the USA gets tougher year after year and, over the years, many have settled down and many others have stayed on the road, trying harder; honest people all, save for a relative few criminals who give the rest of us a bad name. Still, violence is seldom associated with even bad Travellers and we feel that we are at least as basically law-abiding as any other ethnic minority in America.

I cannot give you a history of our people in the time I have available but I can give you perhaps a bit of the flavor of my own lineage:

My Traveller grandfather, as a boy, said goodbye around 1880 to two of his older brothers. They left New York along the Canadian border to bring their horse herd to Texas. He never saw them again but their surname lives on among many Texas Traveller families. My grandfather grew up to be a bit of a con-man, I'm afraid. He was known to paint the teeth of horses for sale to make them appear younger and healthier. This was well over one hundred years ago.

My grandmother, as a girl of ten, led her two younger sisters and also two younger aunts across the Atlantic via steamship. They sailed to America to rejoin their parents who had come here earlier to earn passage money for their kids. There was no shortage of Traveller families on the other side to take care of them until they left. She married by age fourteen and eventually bore six live children. Granny helped support her family by reading the cards as a fortune-teller. I visited her often and lived with her for a while. She could neither read nor write. She had a hard life, I think, but told wonderful stories.

Time grows short, I'm afraid.

My Uncle Eddie was born in a covered wagon in Kentucky. He was forever after known as "The Little Colonel" and one of his daughters, Rosemary, my first cousin and best friend among the Travellers, fittingly was born in a tent. Please say a prayer for Rosemary.

As for me, I followed the road differently than most Travellers, coming to it later in life and seeking only peace and comfort after a time of great trial. I found it too.

Thank you for your interest in us, M_____

Richard

[9/23/02] Travellers' Rest is getting way too many hits and producing way too many e-mails for me to handle effectively. Especially onerous are the requests for interviews; the time has come to restate my policy on those:

I am not a spokesman for the Irish Travellers and therefore not in any position to grant interviews. The web site, Travellers' Rest, contains pretty much all I know about my mother's family that would be of interest to Country People and I limit my comments to that site in the interest of maintaining control of the text which may be quoted and the context in which it is set.

Additionally, after some years of gradual deterioration, the final definitive symptom of Parkinson's Disease kicked in earlier this year and both my verbal and my typing skills are greatly challenged under even the slightest stress. If you knew how long it took me to phrase, type and edit even this brief addendum, you would understand that my bulwark of reluctance has been impregnably bolstered by sheer incapacity.

So there it is. I'll try to respond to your e-mails but I cannot promise that you will be satisfied with the speed and comprehensiveness of my replies.

[10/1/02] I'm pretty sure that I am going start an F.A.Q. page soon with links to this and the main Traveller pages. If I owe you answers to your e-mailed questions, you will probably find them there within a few weeks. Sorry, but some days we've had 40,000 and 50,000 pages downloaded, according to the server. The traffic knocked my little "hit" counter completely out of whack and, more to the point, generated a lot more mail than I can handle. Now it's settled down again (for a while).